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Paying other people to make up for our shortcomings

May 20, 2011
by

It is entirely our fault as parents that Tea hasn’t a clue what sports are.  With the exception of a few minutes of some high school track meets and football games we’ve walked past in our neighborhood, he’s never seen a sporting event.  Not even on TV, since we don’t turn ours on.  Kyle enjoys a few Brewers games each summer, but otherwise, we’re just not into sports.  Tea has been known to see, say, a tennis ball, and remark, “That’s a basefootball.”  This lack of parental sports guidance is probably criminal in our society.

Enter the 3-4 year old soccer group.  What a deal!  For $30, Tea gets 6 practices and 6 games.  That’s not only 10 hours of adult-led exposure to a sport that seems kinda fun and very energy-consuming.  It’s 10 hours of sports instruction by someone other than me.  I failed tennis in high school.  I literally got an F.  I also got vibrant bruises across my shins from bashing them with every. single. serve.  I couldn’t help hitting myself with my own racquet.  I want absolutely nothing to do with Tea’s sports education.

Warm  up is by far the cutest part of soccer practice.  After that it all sort of goes downhill into an excersize that looks a lot like the coaches trying to herd cats.  But Tea is having fun.

Tea does practice drills well, but at games the poor kid runs back and forth, back and forth, back and forth, never touching the ball in 40 minutes.  While it doesn’t dampen his spirits, he comes off the field saying, “I waited for my turn to kick the ball, but noone gave it to me.”

Try as we might, we can’t get him to understand competition.  Why he is so adept at taking the toys his little brother is playing with but can’t translate the concept the field is beyond me.  It couldn’t have anything to do with our parenting, right?  Our boys are doomed.

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5 Comments leave one →
  1. Courtney permalink
    May 21, 2011 7:25 am

    You are a much, much better parent than I. Organized sports fill me with dread. I am hoping I can push that whole can of worms off for a few more years.

    But Tea is super cute and I can see how a morning at the soccer field with coffee in hand and sun shining and cuteness running around all over might be nice. In theory.

  2. jennifer permalink
    May 22, 2011 6:27 pm

    I hate sports. However, I married a weekend warrior. He has the broken bones to prove it. I have pictures. So, send the boys to my house. Todd will take care of it. He is kinda a ball hog, though. Also, he may need to coach something, since the only sport Sid can do is swimming. Me, too.
    Mainly I recommend sports for little people to wear them out, and teach rules, listening to the adult in charge, and playing fair. You’d be surprised how many kids don’t get that, and try to spike in Candyland.

  3. Anne permalink
    May 23, 2011 12:10 pm

    Is this through the park and rec department?

    • May 23, 2011 12:20 pm

      Hi Anne,
      It’s a local club that has a “skills only” side that is not competitive at all (no score keeping, at least at this age), and a competitive team side. I like it because they offer both options for kids throughout the elementary and middle school ages, so kids can divide themselves by how driven they are. The “just for fun” players will presumably start to separate out once the kids are old enough for the competitive team. Not sure we’ll be in it that long, though. 😉

      • Anne permalink
        May 25, 2011 3:22 pm

        That is a really good idea, they don’t have anything like that up by us..

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